Marriage Update

I really like being married. I feel like my schedule is indeed hectic and frequently unpredictable. Being married means, for the most part, I am guaranteed at a least a little bit of time when my husband each day.

Lately, that time has been spent falling asleep rewatching one episode of Downton Abbey. (Well, I’m rewatching, it’s William’s first watch through.) This is not really quality time, but it is together time.

This week I was listening to a radio intewfoew from the author of a new book on Adam and Eve. I hav not read the book, and honestly probably won’t in the future, but the author has one of he most amazing philosophies about marriage that I have heard.

He says that the biggest difference between marriage and dating is that in marriage the default is always a win. When you’re dating, every bump in the road, every challenge brings to mind a moment of doubt. There is no covenant between you and your partner, so at any point one obstacle is allowed to be too great for you to overcome.

Ideally, marriage is the opposite. In a true covenant relationship any challenge, obstacle, argument, difference, or down-right fight should have a predetermined conclusion. However long it takes, however upset you have become, however dark the night there is always the promise that your love will win the day.

I love my husband, and I would never have married him if I thought there was any shimmer of doubt that we could overcome anything together. I would never have married him if I wasn’t willing to commit to work through all of our issues and challenges.

I hope most people enter into marriage with that mindset. But we are all human.

I love this idea of marriage because I believe it is a beautiful example of the gospel. For those of us who follow Jesus, we can enter into any dark and desperate situation with the hope and assurance that death does not have the last word! We don’t have to fear the darkness because dawn comes in the morning.

And this covenant we have through Jesus is not humanly fallible. It is not subject to the sin and weaknesses of earthly hearts, but is ensured by the blessings of the Holy Spirit.

I really like being married, and this short message from the guy on the radio reminded me how wonderful a blessing and how crucial a responsibility it is to care for my marriage. And ya know what, I really like being a Christian. I love that ‘death has lost its sting.’ I love that I have the assurance of joy in the morning. I love that love wins no matter what.